My Melbourne Tour

Yesterday night it was almost 1 am when I slept. And at 6a.m my husband wakes me up and says, he come on we have to catch the flight, the taxi is here, you are still sleeping!!

Oh my god, how could that happen, how can I forget we are going to Melbourne, I have not done my packing yet, which dress I would take, and about my daughter, it’s ok, her all dresses are nice and I can just keep a bunch of dresses from the cupboard, but for me, all I have is Indian wear, will it suit there? What do I do? Oh, **** How nicely I should have planned and kept everything for the most memorable trip of ours, and I have been so lazy! L

Now it is too late to regret, we just kept everything in a hurry and got in to the taxi.  Thankfully we reached in time and my daughter Anagha was full of excitement. Everything was checked in, and were through the security check, it was like LEVEL 1 cleared. Hey, there is a direct flight from Hyderabad to Melbourne, that is great. I was so happy, I was really worried how would we manage changing flights, how many hours It would take, how do we handle our luggage during flight transit and so on, above all how would I manage my four year old daughter Anagha in this mess, but bravo, there is direct flight.

We landed in Melbourne after few hours, and there our taxi was waiting. The taxi driver was a Sardarji, that was great; I didn’t even need to ask whether you know English, as we could speak in Hindi. By the way which language they speak in Australia? Who cares? Now we got our own Indian driver. We had good amount of casual talk with him, he assured us Australia is a safe and beautiful place, nothing to worry and we were so happy. And guess what he dropped us to TajMelbourne, Taj group of Hotels from ITC in Melbourne, great!! I felt so so happy. Obviously we had good reception, no problems, I could see Indians everywhere, so did not feel like I am in ‘Pardes’ a foreign land.

My husband paid the advance amount at reservation, he could pay using his ICICI debit card, great!

It was already night, and we discussed in the reception about our next day’s plan, and they told us everything is arranged, we can be ready by 8a.m and they will take us to all the places.

So we had a good sleep in the night, and got up and got ready. I had to wear my Indian attire, Chudidar newly stitched. Thank god at least I had few new dresses and good that my Tailor friend who is also a neighbor gave those dresses only yesterday, even though I gave her the material few months back.

So we went to cricket stadium, that is the first thing I wanted to see, which we have seen in Television since 1980’s where Kapil Dev and Ravi Shastri played.

The next one was another place which was in our priority list, that was Phillip Island, this got the priority because of my daughter Anagha, as she wanted to see Penguins. Why does Babu have to disclose her everything, now that he told her about penguins out there, she wanted to see that first!! So we were there. Oh the lovely penguins, they make so much noise, just like Anagha. If Anagha starts dancing with them, she would as well believe she is one of them!

So soon we were feeling hungry, and I heard, tables were booked for us at Fenix in Victoria and great we reached there by 2pm, and there was something vegetarian to choose from! Babu was experimenting with so many items, Anagha as usual happy with some fruit juice.

Next destination again as per Anagha’s demand Puffing billy steam Railway. Australia’s oldest steam railway. And I tell you the experience was so mesmerizing. That is the real train. These days trains really don’t give us that more than life experience.

What was our next tourist spot? Before I could check out in the pamphlet, I heard somebody calling me, wake up!!

Hey where am I? At home? Was it a dream? Where is Anagha? ‘She went to school’. You did not wake me up?

She wanted to give you surprise, we thought today she will get ready without your help, as you were sleeping!

Is this the surprise? Oh, no. My Melbourne trip?

I thought, no way, I cannot miss the remaining places. I told Babu, what is the balance in your bank account? He asked why?

 I told him  …it's your time to visit Melbourne NOW!’

And asked him to log on to www.visitmelbourne.com/in.

Its not the marriage, its the Love that matters

The discussion is not new its as old as Shiva and Parvathi, and when goddess chose Shiva who was not considered as ideal husband by her parents, but still she married him and they became the ideal couple to the world, and we call them as 'vaak artha iva samprikthau, jagatah pitarau vande parvati parameshwarau' Is there any question or doubt about Love marriage?

We have seen many couple around us, since childhood starting from parents. The married life of parents very much affects the thoughts of children. If they are happily married and an ideal couple children will think theirs was the best marriage, it could be Love or Arranged. Then you start looking at all the people around you and have your own conclusions on marriages. But hey until you are married what ever analysis you do on others life is fake!! Because none of the couple will show what they are inside outside! So all your assumptions they are happy, they are unhappy is baseless.

So how do you decide whether to go for Love marriage or Arranged? You need not decide. When it happens it happens. If you fall in love and get same reciprocation from otherside, just go with that. If you do not fall in love, or if you do not get reciprocation from otherside, just go with traditional search and love the partner you get. It is that simple. Nobody decides to fall in love. If you decide to go for Love marriage and go on rejecting all proposals you get from traditional ways, you might have missed your love in one of them, who knows!!

And after marriage, whether it was Love marriage or Arranged marriage, it is the Love for each other that makes or breaks a marriage.

If each person has a space for other person in his heart, ready to make sacrifices, then only the life long partnership will continue. If one is selfish, and does not want to sacrifice anything for the sake of partner, then  no doubt the marriage will not last.

Love marriage with the blessings of elders is a dream come true. But often it does not happen, but then you are proud you have taken your decision, you have not ditched the person whom you loved, you take all the responsibility to keep the other person happy. The other person will not ditch you because he or she know how much you sacrificed to marry her.

My vote is for Love marriage, as long as both the people involved in decision making are mature and sensible. But I really wonder how many of the young generation are really smart enough to take right decisions, choose the right life partner. Because you do not choose a life partner just because she likes the same chocolate which you eat, but if she reads the same book you read, there is some match. But again it is not common interest that matters, it is how much love you have for each other, how much of an extra mile you will go to keep your love light the way.

As long as you want to make your partner's life a heaven and not hell, and do not expect him to make your life heaven, then your life, love and everything around you will be a paradise.

check out the new TV Program here www.facebook.com/LoveYaArrange.

Enchanting Shimoga

 

Anagha Visits Nompi's House Slideshow Slideshow

Anagha Visits Nompi's House Slideshow Slideshow: TripAdvisor™ TripWow ★ Anagha Visits Nompi's House Slideshow Slideshow ★ to Shimoga. Stunning free travel slideshows on TripAdvisor

Preparing the child for the school

Each one of us, except a few find it difficult to make their kids adjust to the school in the initial phases. My daughter went to play school only until I accompanied her and after that I could see that she has been crying a lot and I stopped sending her. Where as a neighboring girl six months elder to my daughter never had any problem from day one! At that time I felt the reason might be our language. We speak in Kannada at home and had moved to Hyderabad just one year back. But later I found that is not the reason for her discomfort. When I put her to Nursery in Bachpan a year later, she adjusted within a week and though she hesitated in the initial weeks, later she went without much problem. By the time she came to LKG, I put her in Laurus and she went for only two days and refused to go. Then I put her back in Bachpan and she started going happily from Day one, and the timings were 9 to 2pm. Few kids go happily from day one and few don’t, so what do we do about it.

Let me share you my experience, my effort in making her feel secure outside the home. First of all take your kids to your neighbor’s house, stay there for some time. I know it’s a boring exercise, but we need to do it. I have often seen parents asking kids to play by themselves and would not like to stay in neighbor’s house for more than ten minutes. So staying in an apartment was a blessing for me. To add to that we have kids of all age groups in our apartment. She would spend lot of time with her two friends who were of the same age. Initially I would always sit with her for 10 to 15 minutes while she is playing. Then I would come home for few minutes, would go back if she cried. Then I would stay with her for long next time. Like this it went on for few months. Later she started going to these friends house all by herself and would tell me not to accompany her. You just need to make them feel safe there by going with them every time or every day for half an hour or so. After few days they become familiar with everybody in the other house and feel safe. It also gives you an opportunity to understand your neighbor, and how good is their company for your kid. So by the age of 2 and ½ years my daughter was comfortably playing in her friend’s homes. Sraddha’s house, Saanvika’s house and sometimes charisma’s house. She also picked good amount of Telugu.

I liked Bachpan, Nizampet as it has qualified teachers who are fluent in English. Also the Director Sravanti is an Engineer by education. I liked the study material, and it was definitely better option than Lilliput. I joined her in Nursery, and I took her to the school for 2 -3 days before the school reopened. So that I could stay with her while she played in the play area. I made her feel comfortable in school. It was like a park or play house where her mother accompanied her, so she was happy to go. Also I got the uniform before the school actually started, made her wear the uniform and took her to school.

When the school actually began, the Director Sravanthi told us to keep our hearts strong and brave and to leave the kid even if he or she cries. And first week the school was only for half an hour! So first week all  Nursery kids went for half an hour, though my daughter cried on first day, she didn’t cry the other days, because she thought it gets over so fast and it was fun! Next week the school was for three hours i.e. 9 to 12, but we brought her at 10.30 itself for one week. Later as she liked to come by Van with friends, we told her then you can come by Van. Coming by van meant staying till 12noon, which she did not realize.

She liked her class teacher very much. The class teacher was available to us over phone. So whenever she came home sad, I would call her and ask what happened, and she would explain. The class teacher Rama had very well understood the psychology of my child. I am sure she would have understood each child in the same way. My daughter enjoyed doing home work, as she felt it’s a matter of pride like other grown up kids. Now she too has got books and home work J

The school took them on outings once or twice. All festivals they celebrate with lot of enthusiasm. Friendship day, blue day, I day, all festivals so and so forth.  A dance teacher came to train them for the annual day function. My daughter’s song was ‘O My friend Ganesha’. She enjoyed that too. On the annual day we were supposed to send them at 8.30am, from school they would go to Auditorium, which was near hi Tech city. I was wondering whether she can manage. But to my astonishment she went happily, she was dressed up by her teachers, she did not cry on the stage.

Also at every point, I keep her informed what will happen. I will tell her, they will take you to auditorium from school; your teacher will dress you up. There will be lot of people in the auditorium. They will watch your dance and clap loudly if you dance well. So on and so forth.

She even went to wish the Governor of Andhrapradesh on Rakshabhandan with her school mates. That was again something which we doubted, but she surprised us by completing that assignment also without any crying or troubling teachers.

At the same time she could not adjust to Laurus School at all. I felt neither the teachers nor the ayahs were well trained to handle small kids.

To summarise I would tell that, it’s good to consult few parents and take their suggestion. Also every kid is different, depending on your kid’s upbringing you have to mentally prepare them for school. Never tell a kid that ‘if you don’t eat I will send you to school’ or never make statements like ‘teacher will beat you’.

Since they start walking and speaking, make them feel school is a good experience. Make them long for school. Whenever they tell I want to go to school, tell them you are too young, you should eat properly then we will send you to school. So that the child feels it’s something which it should earn, like he earns a chocolate for doing good things.

Don’t put them in school for three hours from day one. Convince the teachers and principal and leave them only for half an hour. If possible go with the kid to the school on non working days of school and spend some time there. Bring them back even when they want to play more. Put them in day care for only half an hour or one hour. Stay with them for first week, and then leave them for half an hour. For most of the kids it should be a gradual process. Don’t ask them to wear the uniform on day one, sometimes they don’t want to wear uniform because that means going to school. In that case forget about uniform, put the color dress and tell them you will just go enquire something at school. Talk about other kids coming to school. Tell them there will be birthday parties in school. If you attend school you will get more friends, you can attend more parties. I have put lot of effort to make my daughter feel comfortable at other’s houses, and school. One of my neighbor often tells me ‘hats off to you Bindu’.

Thus sharing my experiences. Hope it helps you.

Enjoy parenting.